Do Crime!

Category: Philosophy and Religion

  • We are plain, quiet folk and have no use for adventures.

    I’ve been doing a bit of reading the last few days, about stoicism, Thoreau, C.S. Lewis, and J.R.R. Tolkien.

    A lot of the essay’s focus on stoicism, of course, as well as the notion of the “hedonistic treadmill,” and the concept of travel.

    I think about the concept of traveling a lot. It seems to be the buzzword, “hobby” of this generation. The ideal that you’re not fully living your life, if you aren’t going somewhere new, often.

    I have mixed feelings on travel, and I say this as someone who has been to 48 states, and 6 countries, and has lived in 3 different states. While the idea of a getaway is nice, I feel like so many people are getting wrapped up in this belief that as their world crumbles around them, getting away can refresh their mind and soul. But, the old saying “wherever you go, there you are” seems to hold true.

    Traveling doesn’t make you better, or fix your problems. It just let’s you step away for a moment, let’s those issues build up, because you stepped away, and didn’t resolve them.

    Face your problems, don’t travel thinking it’ll get better. Your messy home is still there, your love of self-induced drama, the bills you can’t pay because you live your life on credit card financing.

  • Everything comes down to what they say about you when you’re not around.

    The title of this post comes from the song “Dead, Drunk and Naked,” by the Drive-by Truckers. I think about this song lyric a lot. It’s probably one of my favorite lyrics. (Maybe I should start another page of all my favorite song lyrics.)

    It gets followed up with the line “And I wish that he was here now, I’m sure he would be proud, No one talks about me now.”

    When you think about it, that’s all we really are, isn’t it? Our reputation? No one gives a shit about our jobs, or our hobbies, how many video games we’ve played, or what shows we’ve watched on Netflix.

    What they do care about is: Do we show up when they need us? Are we honest? On time?

    This actually has caused a bit of an existential crisis in me lately. I always strive to be the kind of friend I’d like to have. I volunteer to help move, I’m always reaching out to check in, or make plans. I try never to cancel them. But, I’m not grappling with the fact that it may not be entirely altruistic.

    There’s another band, Shelter, who are a “Krishnacore” band, and their lead singer has an interview where he talks about playing music, and whether or not it’s maya or divine. He also tells the story in his book. But, basically, one of his mentors asked him once if he was playing music in worship of Krishna, or if it was because he was trying to be “god,” that is, if he was doing it for the positive attention.

    When I heard him say that, it really sent me into a spiral. Am I trying to be a good friend, or am I performing maya (I’ll be honest, I don’t know if I’m spelling or using this phrase right) by wanting people to talk about me in a positive light when I’m not around. I’m grappling with this, and I’m worried it’s similar to the “nice guy” effect. Which is creepy and gross. I don’t want to be creepy and gross- at least in that “look at me!” kind of way.

    That’s all I’ve got. Listen to The Drive-By Truckers, listen to Shelter. Do crime. Plant a garden where you shouldn’t.

  • Movies and Krishna and hardcore and Jesus and joy.

    The title of this post comes from a line by my favorite band The Hold Steady, in their song “Almost Everything.” It’s off of what most of their fans consider their worst album “Teeth Dreams,” yet the older I get, the more this album grows on me.

    The full line is: “Sat in the back of the theater just drinking and talking about movies and Krishna and hardcore and Jesus and joy.”

    This line has been rattling around in my head a lot lately. It brings up a lot of deep, middle-aged despair in my, fueled by nostalgia.

    It brings me back to a time in my life, between 16 and 22, where I spent a lot of nights sitting around with my friends, usually in the back of diners, or Denny’s, parking lots, and riding around in cars, where we just listened to music, and debated religion and politics, talked about our favorite albums and movies and books.

    Now every conversation I have is about money, or chores, or people’s kids. The religion conversations I have now are “you should join my church,” or “just trust Jesus.” These contrast steadily to conversations of old, where we debated the existence of God, talked about Christianity vs Krishna, where the councils of Nicaea held any merit. Political talk today feels the same. It’s “Democrats are bad,” or “Trump is a dictator,” or “ICE is the president’s private militia.” Any yes, I agree with some of these statements, yet they miss any nuance. I miss talking about what politics need to change, how to do it, why tax rates matter, where the money should go.

    I miss having these in depth conversations, where when voices got raised, it was with passion and reason and logic, and not some blind faith to the absurd with no reasoning other than “you’re wrong because you don’t believe me, and I won’t and can’t explain my position.”